"This was supposed to be a class about bingo," said a visibly portal-lagged Atton. "I give up. I'm never using the Danger Shop again."

The Danger Shop was not a bingo hall.

The Danger Shop was a giant ball pit.

Atton threw his hands up, wandered towards the sole chair in the corner, and collapsed in it.

"So I feel like we haven't done enough discussion lately," Atton said ( Read more... )

Today, Atton had asked the class to meet up at Fast Eddie's. "Morning, class," he said. "You're going bowling. Go get your ugly shoes."

... Nobody could prove he was doing this to avoid another chicken-related embarrassment. Nobody. "I want you kids to look into the factors that lay beneath the concept of odds," he said. "Sure, chance is a big ( Read more... )

"I was going to take you to the horse races today to talk about bookies and odds, doing your research to know which odds are both smart and profitable, yadda yadda yadda," Atton said.

He waved vaguely at the field full of villagers cheering on four chickens running across the field"Obviously," he said, "Someone's gotten into the simulator again ( Read more... )

"So I don't think politics on some planet that some of you aren't even from is really a reason to disrupt a class," Atton said. "On the other hand, I have personal experience with what happens when an asshole takes over your sh-- planet, republic, whatever, so I thought I'd compromise ( Read more... )

"Today, we're getting into the nitty-gritty of calculating odds," Atton said. "None of that gut feeling stuff here. We're going to be talking percentages." He walked from table to table, putting down handouts of... sums.

Yep, kids. You were getting an actual math class ( Read more... )

"Okay, so, today I was going to talk to you about roulette," Atton said, "A game where taking a risk is rewarded strongly... if you win." He gestured towards the Danger Shop behind him. "So I'm going to take you to a casino, and--"

Poof.

A wheel appeared ( Read more... )

"Right, do or die time," Atton said, clapping his hands. He was standing in front of three doors. "Pick a door, get through the scenario, come out the other end. That's it. That's the class."

He jabbed his thumb towards the doors. "Safeties are on. Scram."

"Next week, I'm going to put you all in a situation where the deck is obviously stacked against you," Atton said. "House odds will be high, but you won't be playing card games ( Read more... )

"So, you guys just had your parents to deal with, so let's make this week's class nice and easy," Atton said ( Read more... )